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Lipton’s Journal/January 25, 1955/258: Difference between revisions

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With Adele{{LJ:Adele}} I found the lovely sensitive woman who was always in my father, and Adele whose sensitivity is deep like my father’s also plays the fool like my father. He says pompous things which repel one; she says silly things which make one ridicule her. But while the woman is dominant in Adele, the masculine element (my mother) is present. In times of stress—quarrels between us, etc.—Adele puts her head down and slugs it out toe to toe, just like my mother. Her rages are strong, her affection is strong, her loyalty is essentially constant but she plays with her loyalty to me, she examines it with the sensitivity of my father.
With Adele{{LJ:Adele}} I found the lovely sensitive woman who was always in my father, and Adele whose sensitivity is deep like my father’s also plays the fool like my father. He says pompous things which repel one; she says silly things which make one ridicule her. But while the woman is dominant in Adele, the masculine element (my mother) is present. In times of stress—quarrels between us, etc.—Adele puts her head down and slugs it out toe to toe, just like my mother. Her rages are strong, her affection is strong, her loyalty is essentially constant but she plays with her loyalty to me, she examines it with the sensitivity of my father.


What I have tried to outline here is that we do not marry mother-substitutes or father-substitutes, we marry (especially if we are bisexual) mother-father embodiments. But we choose the embodiment we are best able to deal with, and for that matter admire—which is a way of saying “What the world will approve of most.” But there is no escaping it. When we find a mother-father embodiment {{del|which}}{{ins|my God}} {{ins|who}} corresponds closely to what we truly need (given the particular H vs. S imbroglio we can hardly escape her or him). Weird marriages one must always attempt to understand, for they are the marriages of people who are very close homeodynamically (the word is just frightful—I’ve got to get something between that and soul.))
What I have tried to outline here is that we do not marry mother-substitutes or father-substitutes, we marry (especially if we are bisexual) mother-father embodiments. But we choose the embodiment we are best able to deal with, and for that matter admire—which is a way of saying “What the world will approve of most.” But there is no escaping it. When we find a mother-father embodiment {{del|which}}{{ins|my God}} {{ins|who}} corresponds closely to what we truly need (given the particular H vs. S imbroglio we can hardly escape her or him). Weird marriages one must always attempt to understand, for they are the marriages of people who are very close homeodynamically (the word is just frightful—I’ve got to get something between that and soul.)


{{Notes}}
{{Notes}}