The Mailer Review/Volume 5, 2011/Trust
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| « | The Mailer Review • Volume 5 Number 1 • 2011 • Norris Mailer: A Life in Words | » |
In front of my set, I am the black hood,
The obliging executioner, real justice.
The talking heads all ask for my pity, as if
Anyone really believed their do-good
Crap, this electronic absolution;
But I have spent a gray day, shedding gray blood,
Watching prideless scum pissing in train stations,
And know hawks from handjobs when the light’s good.
My set tells me the day’s atrocities:
With door expensively buttressed, it can name names,
Show smirking punk faces, keep score of these grim games.
Chewing through each mea culpa, each gristly plea
By the latest crud’s milk-fed amicus,
I pass bitter judgment with dessert and coffee.
A fair man, only lately cruel, I put my trust
In this: flick a switch, and the horror dies.
My first visit to the Colony, two years back, was made with some
apprehension: might things have changed, been rudely moved about,
eliminated? Had the precious feel of the place, wrought of singular
moments like pearls strung through time, been lost?
Doing my best Inspector General from basement to aerie, it was gratifying to see that it had not. Flocked wall, lush linen, canvasses of Mailer women: everywhere, Norris’s artist’s eye warmly abides.
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Most personally gratifying, though, was the small study/TV room just off the kitchen, where he kept his current reading matter on a small table by that beat-up easy chair. Still clearly at hand were copies of some of the journals I’d religiously sent him over the years, bookmarked at my pieces. Hard by, there were several issues of Poetry, of Chicago.
That also made me smile.
While claiming any influence at all over a whirlwind like Norman might seem uppity, I do take substantial credit for his increased interest in verse over the last several years of his life. Whether or not it was simply kind indulgence, Norman had always taken my efforts and sensibilities as a poet seriously. Many are the Mailerites who showed up for Norman’s readings. Norman actually showed up for one of mine.
But I digress.
It must have been nine or ten years ago—I can’t place it exactly. It was a sticky July night, shrouds of mist roiling in off the water, the harbor lights vague suggestions. Norris, as was her fashion, cleaned up quickly after dinner and made herself scarce, safe from a further source of hot air. Norris understood how the anticipation of these summer talks with hisself fueled me through the classroom doldrums of winter. As kind as she was lovely, she always left us alone.
We settled in at the snug bar, he behind and I before, and my host set out a pair of heavy cut glass tumblers, followed by a bottle of single-malt Scotch. In baggy denim shirt and under white poll, the old man before me looked more Santa Claus than O’Neillian barkeep, but even at an advanced age, Norman could drink me under the table and halfway into the basement. I ritually grieved for all the gems I’d forget by morning.
Late the previous afternoon, a prankish Norman, with a simple “This is my old friend Bob—I’m sure you two will find plenty to talk about,” had introduced me to Harvard’s renowned Dr. Robert Lifton, then disappeared upstairs. For all I knew, the affable, shaggy-haired man in weathered overalls before me could have been an unhung horse thief from the next county. But, as with most of Norman’s little jokes, this one turned out well. Lifton
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