Talk:Lipton’s Journal: Difference between revisions
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'''Project citation''': {{cite web |url=https://prmlr.us/liptons |title=Lipton’s Journal |last=Mailer |first=Norman |editor1-last=Lennon |editor1-first=J. Michael |editor2-last=Lucas |editor2-first=Gerald R. |editor3-last=Mailer |editor3-first=Susan |date=2020 |website=Project Mailer |publisher=The Norman Mailer Society |access-date=2020-12-20 |quote= |ref=harv }} | |||
==Entry Dates== | ==Entry Dates== | ||
===December 1, 1954=== | ===December 1, 1954=== | ||
Line 14: | Line 17: | ||
| 4 || 4 || In relation to (1) || L1 || || Note. | | 4 || 4 || In relation to (1) || L1 || || Note. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 5 || 5 || The concentration camp novel || | | 5 || 5 || The concentration camp novel || {{icon|DYK2}} || || Note. Unclear x-ref # in note. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 6 || 6 || One should always listen attentively || || || Note. | | 6 || 6 || One should always listen attentively || || || Note. | ||
Line 26: | Line 29: | ||
| 10 || 10 || I upset Herbert [Aptheker] by saying || || || | | 10 || 10 || I upset Herbert [Aptheker] by saying || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 11 || 11 || In a short novel || || | | 11 || 11 || In a short novel || || {{icon|NO}} || Note. | ||
|} | |} | ||
Line 34: | Line 37: | ||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | ! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 12 || 12 || One should always try to || || | | 12 || 12 || One should always try to || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 13 || 13 || It seems to me that || || || | | 13 || 13 || It seems to me that || || || | ||
Line 168: | Line 171: | ||
| 69 || 68 || “Vested interest” is enormously more || || || | | 69 || 68 || “Vested interest” is enormously more || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 70 || 69 || Get beneath words || || | | 70 || 69 || Get beneath words || || {{icon|NO}} (partial) || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 71 || 70 || The gossip is the great || || || | | 71 || 70 || The gossip is the great || || || | ||
Line 188: | Line 191: | ||
| 79 || 78 || The breakup with Lulu || || || Note. | | 79 || 78 || The breakup with Lulu || || || Note. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 80 || 79 || Jokes. Charley Wiener just said || || | | 80 || 79 || Jokes. Charley Wiener just said || || {{icon|NO}} || Note needed?: Charley Wiener | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 81 || 80 || Eitel in court || || | | 81 || 80 || Eitel in court || || {{icon|NO}} || Note. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 82 || 81 || In error there is also truth || || || | | 82 || 81 || In error there is also truth || || || | ||
Line 204: | Line 207: | ||
| 87 || 86 || One thing must be said || L85, L71 || || | | 87 || 86 || One thing must be said || L85, L71 || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 88 || 87 || Stories of dreams || || | | 88 || 87 || Stories of dreams || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 89 || 88 || Bombing as the great shitting || || | | 89 || 88 || Bombing as the great shitting || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 90 || 89 || Comedians and comic writers || || | | 90 || 89 || Comedians and comic writers || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 91 || 90 || Women who always hate || || || | | 91 || 90 || Women who always hate || || || | ||
Line 214: | Line 217: | ||
| 92 || 91 || The more knowledge || || || | | 92 || 91 || The more knowledge || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 93 || 92 || Possibly, bad works of art || || | | 93 || 92 || Possibly, bad works of art || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 94 || 93 || The spy (another adventurer) || || || Note. | | 94 || 93 || The spy (another adventurer) || || || Note. | ||
Line 220: | Line 223: | ||
| 95 || 94 || Actors and spies || || || | | 95 || 94 || Actors and spies || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 96 || 95 || When a friend says || || | | 96 || 95 || When a friend says || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 97 || 96 || “Am I boring you?” || || || | | 97 || 96 || “Am I boring you?” || || || | ||
Line 254: | Line 257: | ||
| 112 || 111 || My journal again || || || | | 112 || 111 || My journal again || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 113 || 112 || False humility || || | | 113 || 112 || False humility || || {{icon|NO}} || Seems like this should not be cut, as L115 alludes to it. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 114 || 113 || Marion Faye journal || || || | | 114 || 113 || Marion Faye journal || || || | ||
Line 262: | Line 265: | ||
| 116 || 115 || Humor is more than wit || || || | | 116 || 115 || Humor is more than wit || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 117 || 116 || Marion Faye’s note || || | | 117 || 116 || Marion Faye’s note || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 118 || 117 || Man may be terrible || || | | 118 || 117 || Man may be terrible || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 119 || 118 || The fear of being ridiculous || || || | | 119 || 118 || The fear of being ridiculous || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 120 || 119 || Toward the end of Marion || || | | 120 || 119 || Toward the end of Marion || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 121 || 120 || Marion Faye’s note about || || | | 121 || 120 || Marion Faye’s note about || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 122 || 121 || Any art-work which || || || | | 122 || 121 || Any art-work which || || || | ||
Line 300: | Line 303: | ||
| 132 || 131 || Seriously, truly, just simply || || || | | 132 || 131 || Seriously, truly, just simply || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 133 || 132 || In Marion Faye’s journal || || | | 133 || 132 || In Marion Faye’s journal || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 134 || 133 || Jazz is more creative || || || | | 134 || 133 || Jazz is more creative || || || | ||
Line 306: | Line 309: | ||
| 135 || 134 || I used to be outwardly || || || | | 135 || 134 || I used to be outwardly || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 136 || 135 || Years ago, working with Malaquais || || | | 136 || 135 || Years ago, working with Malaquais || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 137 || 136 || The world allows us to express || || || | | 137 || 136 || The world allows us to express || || || | ||
Line 342: | Line 345: | ||
| 153 || 152 || Don Beda should be || || || | | 153 || 152 || Don Beda should be || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 154 || 153 || Time as the sense of society || || || | | 154 || 153 || Time as the sense of society || || || Added hand-written note, but need to check last two words. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 155 || 154 || Bob Lindner. As he reads || || || Notes. | | 155 || 154 || Bob Lindner. As he reads || || || Notes. | ||
Line 370: | Line 373: | ||
| 164 || 163 || Perhaps a man kills || || || | | 164 || 163 || Perhaps a man kills || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 165 || 164 || With Marion Faye this took || || | | 165 || 164 || With Marion Faye this took || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 166 || 165 || A psychopath expands || || || | | 166 || 165 || A psychopath expands || || || | ||
Line 384: | Line 387: | ||
| 171 || 170 || The sensitivity spectrum || || || Note. | | 171 || 170 || The sensitivity spectrum || || || Note. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 172 || 171 || Does telepathic mean sick telepathy? || || | | 172 || 171 || Does telepathic mean sick telepathy? || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 173 || 172 || On television, many of the ads || || || | | 173 || 172 || On television, many of the ads || || || | ||
Line 392: | Line 395: | ||
| 175 || 174 || Listening to Dizzy Gillespie || || || Note. | | 175 || 174 || Listening to Dizzy Gillespie || || || Note. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 176 || 175 || Word echoes || || | | 176 || 175 || Word echoes || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 177 || 176 || I suspect that an index || || || | | 177 || 176 || I suspect that an index || || || | ||
Line 424: | Line 427: | ||
| 191 || 190 || There’s no such thing || || || | | 191 || 190 || There’s no such thing || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 192 || 191 || How do you like my || || | | 192 || 191 || How do you like my || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 193 || 192 || Fatty foods are cunt foods || || | | 193 || 192 || Fatty foods are cunt foods || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 194 || 193 || Bob told the pickle factory joke || || || | | 194 || 193 || Bob told the pickle factory joke || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 195 || 194 || Obscenity substitutes || || | | 195 || 194 || Obscenity substitutes || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 196 || 195 || Obscenity echoes || || || | | 196 || 195 || Obscenity echoes || || || | ||
|- | |- | ||
| 197 || 196 || In ''Barbary Shore'' I planted || || | | 197 || 196 || In ''Barbary Shore'' I planted || || {{icon|NO}} || | ||
|} | |} | ||
===January 20, 1955=== | ===January 20, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 198 || 197 || The poor drawing || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 199 || 198 || Looking at myself || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 200 || 199 || This is the age || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 201 || 200 || When we run across || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 202 || 201 || The tragic air of Mexico || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 203 || 202 || Rich boys are proud || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 204 || 203 || “Instants” and “moments” || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 205 || 204 || John Walsh is a homosexual || || || Note. NM wrote “expand” in the margin-left of the last paragraph. | |||
|- | |||
| 206 || 205 || If I have qualities of genius || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 207 || 206 || The Perfect Secretary || || || See NM’s written gloss. | |||
|- | |||
| 208 || 207 || The night Bob spoke || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 209 || 208 || The affected person || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 210 || 209 || How much real hatred || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 211 || 210 || What we do on the surface || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 212 || 211 || Homeostasis may be true || || {{icon|NO}} (partial) || | |||
|- | |||
| 213 || 212 || Our perception of others || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 214 || 213 || Word echoes. Son is sin || || || | |||
|} | |||
===January 24, 1955=== | ===January 24, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 215 || 214 || Word echoes. Possible way || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 216 || 215 || Friday, Saturday, and Sunday || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 217 || 216 || To begin with, one || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 218 || 217 || How I’m getting to love || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 219 || 218 || Spies are takers || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 220 || 219 || Thoughts about ''The Deer Park'' || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 221 || 220 || When Elena is first introduced || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 222 || 221 || Wrestlers and boxers || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 223 || 222 || Homeostasis and sociostasis || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 224 || 223 || What I have noticed || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 225 || 224 || My character. I have always || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 226 || 225 || Remember: The fear of being || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 227 || 226 || In The Journal of Marion Faye || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 228 || 227 || The movement of my writing || || || Should McLeod be glossed? | |||
|- | |||
| 229 || 228 || I have always been the romantic || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 230 || 229 || To condemn || L205, L228 || || | |||
|- | |||
| 231 || 230 || Our resistance about changing || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 232 || 231 || Rojo and ojo || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 233 || 232 || Man and his dog || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 234 || 233 || For three years while writing || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 235 || 234 || Romance and realism || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 236 || 235 || The saint and the psychopath || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 237 || 236 || In the saint-psychopath sense || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 238 || 237 || This is the best day || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 239 || 238 || I was deeply instinctively right || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 240 || 239 || Yet the course of human history || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 241 || 240 || For years, unknowingly || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 242 || 241 || Bebop. P and B are sibling consonants || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 244 || 243 || Golfers are people who take || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 245 || 244 || Put another way, the sociostatic || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 246 || 245 || But look at the philosophical || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 247 || 246 || It also suggests that action || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 248 || 247 || Which leads me to || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 249 || 248 || English is so magnificently blunt || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 250 || 249 || To go back to note 245 || L245 || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 251 || 250 || Joyful thought || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 252 || 251 || Children’s eating || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 253 || 252 || Everybody is both male and female || || || Should NM’s spelling be made consistent: e.g., bi-sexual or bisexual? | |||
|} | |||
===January 25, 1955=== | ===January 25, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 254 || 253 || The advances in medicine || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 255 || 254 || The predictor, the prophet || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 256 || 255 || The above note || L255 || || | |||
|- | |||
| 257 || 256 || Bob is the dishonest man || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 258 || 257 || I wonder if one doesn’t || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 259 || 258 || Typing errors || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 260 || 259 || But I wanted to finish || || {{icon|NO}} (partial) || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 261 || 260 || What I wrote about Sergius || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 262 || 261 || This Journal in so far || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 263 || 262 || I realized so many funny || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 264 || 263 || Since I started this Journal || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 265 || 264 || The sense of time || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 266 || 265 || Old people don’t slow down || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 267 || 266 || To continue 265 I wonder || L265 || || | |||
|- | |||
| 268 || style="background: red;" | 268 || The interesting confirmation || L267 || || | |||
|- | |||
| 269 || 269 || Fed up. We stuff ourselves || || {{icon|NO}} || Joe Rosenthal should be glossed? | |||
|- | |||
| 270 || 270 || Radicals. Particularly socialists || || || Fra Jean? | |||
|- | |||
| 271 || 271 || Prose on wings, tra-la, tra-la || L270 || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 272 || 272 || So, modestly, I see my mission || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 273 || 273 || Jews hated Hitler violently || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 274 || 274 || What is a monster? || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|} | |||
===January 26, 1955=== | ===January 26, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 275 || 275 || I am coming to believe || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 276 || 276 || I have noticed in analytic || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 277 || 277 || Let me put it this way || || || Should "basis" be "basic" in sentence 1? | |||
|- | |||
| 278 || 278 || I know now why I || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 279 || 279 || Clues, mysteries, puns || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 280 || 280 || In this sense, we are all || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 281 || 281 || If the above sounds very fancy || L280 || || | |||
|- | |||
| 282 || 282 || Sociostasis and sociostasis || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 283 || 283 || So in that sense || L282 || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 284 || 284 || Little confirmations of 282 || L282 || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 285 || 285 || I have to face something || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 286 || 286 || Dialogue: Yesterday, Hiram Haydn || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 287 || 287 || Word echoes: Go, man, go || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 288 || 288 || Bob Lindner is in the dramatic || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 289 || 289 || Let me try 283 again || L283 || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 290 || 290 || Now I come back || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 291 || 291 || The all-out Marxist || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 292 || 292 || Now, back to 290 || L290, L395 (in note) || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 293 || 293 || I’m getting exhausted || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 294 || 294 || One takes in order to understand || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 295 || 295 || But wrestlers who are givers || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 296 || 296 || Talk is cheap, action is hard || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 297 || 297 || Jokes. Argo. || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 298 || 298 || No wonder I’ve always been || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 299 || 299 || Back to x Jargon || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 300 || 300 || B is the first consonant || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 301 || 301 || Infant and I am faint || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 302 || 302 || Ant and ''and'' || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 303 || 303 || Obscenities: 69 || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 304 || 304 || Jazz. Z and s are sibling components || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 305 || 305 || At this moment I’m sick || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 306 || 306 || But what a compulsion || L305 || || | |||
|- | |||
| 307 || 307 || I’m getting weary || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 308 || 308 || Fuck, piss, cock, shit, cunt || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 309 || 309 || I have heard writers say || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 310 || 310 || When I was a kid || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 311 || 311 || My pompous man again || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 312 || 312 || It seems obvious that insanity || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 313 || 313 || Word echoes. Job || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 314 || 314 || Aristocrats are usually takers || || || | |||
|} | |||
===January 27, 1955=== | ===January 27, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 315 || 315 || As was evident in the notes || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 316 || 316 || But what is also interesting || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 317 || 317 || What I distrust of course. || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 318 || 318 || On the positive side || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 319 || 319 || Letter echoes: Be || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 320 || 320 || For some time I have wanted || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 321 || 321 || The business of putting || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 322 || 322 || Corollary. Whenever one reads || || || | |||
|} | |||
===January 31, 1955=== | ===January 31, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 323 || 323 || My birthday today || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 324 || 324 || A few word echoes || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 325 || 325 || Give-and-take || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 326 || 326 || The possibility of other || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 327 || 327 || The voice of radio and recordings || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 328 || 328 || But, carry this a step further || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 329 || 329 || One’s own voice || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 330 || 330 || One other observation || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 331 || 331 || Mimics are always psychopaths || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 332 || 332 || Last week I wrote || Search || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 333 || 333 || I have the feeling these days || || || How should the 3rd sentence read? | |||
|- | |||
| 334 || 334 || A great deal of this journal || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 335 || 335 || Jealousy. But what a mountain || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 336 || 336 || The cynic || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 337 || 337 || The conservatism of the female || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 338 || 338 || Word echoes. Breath, stripped || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 339 || 339 || Exceptional people || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 340 || 340 || Which brings me to Bob Lidner || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 341 || 341 || Page 100 || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 342 || 342 || Stimulants. My ideas which started || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 343 || 343 || Fascination keeps us on || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 344 || 344 || What I neglected to say || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 345 || 345 || Half-way stations || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 346 || 346 || Journalists—another variety of psychopath || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 347 || 347 || An interesting confirmation || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 348 || 348 || Pro and con—prick and cunt || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 349 || 349 || The Catholic Church || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 350 || 350 || Word echoes. The and he || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 351 || style="background: red;" | 350A || Word mirrors: || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 352 || 351 || I cannot say it often enough || || || Should “od” be corrected? | |||
|- | |||
| 353 || 352 || Horse-racing. An article || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 354 || 353 || Word echoes: Defense || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 355 || 354 || Word echoes. Good, God || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 356 || 355 || Good. Go to d, Go || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 357 || 356 || Modern painting || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 358 || 357 || The key to Bill Styron’s nature || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 359 || 358 || The inter-fecundation is starting || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 360 || 359 || Which gives an insight into || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 361 || 360 || I am always inept at arguing || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 362 || 361 || More typing errors deliver || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 363 || 362 || God and Jehovah, goal and jail || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 364 || 363 || Word echo: By—By || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 365 || 364 || A lot of this is probably || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 366 || 365 || A corroborating proof || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 367 || 366 || The reformer’s liberal ideas || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 368 || 367 || Nat Halper. His work on the Joyce || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 369 || 368 || Modern art. Liberals, social democrats || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 370 || 369 || Elena is a failure || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 371 || 370 || Cancer. I believe instinctively || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 372 || 371 || For ''The Deer Park'' || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 373 || 372 || Word echoes: If and Is || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 374 || 373 || I wrote the last note || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 375 || 374 || Consonant echoes: X || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 376 || 375 || The cross was where man || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 377 || 376 || Adele’s qualities || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 378 || 377 || The voice || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 379 || 378 || A note on my Self-Analysis || || || Notes. Is “sociismus” supposed to be “socialismus” (socialism)? | |||
|- | |||
| 380 || 379 || Word echoes. Son and sun || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 381 || 380 || What-the-hell || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 382 || 381 || Word echoes. Her and err || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 383 || 382 || What I am doing with letters || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 384 || 383 || Is W the world? || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 385 || 384 || Son of a bitch || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 386 || 385 || Simply, directly, I excited || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 387 || 386 || Once in a while || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 388 || 387 || f and v. F is fuck || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 389 || 388 || I’m getting a little tired now || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 390 || 389 || Anyway, I think I’ll finish || || || Notes. | |||
|} | |||
===February 1, 1955=== | ===February 1, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 391 || 390 || Today makes two months || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 392 || 391 || Last night, having dinner || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 393 || 392 || Later, today, if I can || || {{Icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 394 || 393 || What appears to me right || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 395 || 394 || Word echoes. (I suppose || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 396 || 395 || Another word echo here || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 397 || 396 || The Burglar again || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 398 || 397 || Disagreeable as it is || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 399 || 398 || I suppose the last note || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 400 || 399 || To finish note 390 || 390 || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 401 || 400 || One addition to this || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 402 || 401 || Back from lunch || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 403 || 402 || A comment on the above || 402 || || | |||
|- | |||
| 404 || 403 || At the other end || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 405 || 404 || The Catholic would argue || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 406 || 405 || I may have a clue || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 407 || 406 || Word echoes. I’ve discussed jazz || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 408 || 407 || If my identification of red || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 409 || 408 || Gate. And r: Great. || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 410 || 409 || The strength of the Church. || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 411 || 410 || A note on my father. || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 412 || 411 || And now I understand Monroe || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 413 || 412 || On how I can’t destroy love. || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 414 || 413 || One thing bothers me. || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 415 || 414 || A lay analyst. || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 416 || 415 || I have a hunch || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 417 || 416 || My sexual scar. || 207 || || | |||
|- | |||
| 418 || 417 || Depression is coming on || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 419 || 418 || Perhaps the sexual explanation || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 420 || 419 || Jesus, I’d rather be || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 421 || 420 || A little interesting and || || {{Icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 422 || 421 || Decadence. I wonder || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 423 || 422 || The above note was written || 422 || || | |||
|- | |||
| 424 || 423 || Echoes and opposites. || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 425 || 424 || The spectrum of the saint-psychopath. || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 426 || 425 || The above not ought || 425 || || | |||
|- | |||
| 427 || 426 || Before I quit, I want to list || || {{Icon|NO}} || | |||
|} | |||
===February 2, 1955=== | ===February 2, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 428 || 427 || Continuing on H || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 429 || 428 || The horrible thought occurs || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 430 || 429 || The artist and his paranoia. || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 431 || 430 || Note 214 was about the || 215 || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 432 || 431 || It is really incredible that || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 433 || 432 || Each of the Church’s dictums || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 434 || 433 || The gambler’s debt || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 435 || 434 || I’ve spent the last few hours || || || Notes. Where should the open parenthesis end? I don’t see the last sentence in the original. | |||
|} | |||
===February 7, 1955=== | ===February 7, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 436 || 435 || The opening into myself || || || The first parenthesis does not close. | |||
|- | |||
| 437 || 436 || One idea in this || || {{icon|NO}} || Text added to 436. | |||
|- | |||
| 438 || style="background: red;" | 436 || The intellectual is antipathetic || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 439 || 437 || At any rate each time || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 440 || 438 || I have to explain what || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 441 || 439 || But I go at this || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 442 || 440 || Besides I may discover || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 443 || 441 || Anyway, let’s go back || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 444 || 442 || Parenthesis after parenthesis || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 445 || 443 || The anarchist as he exists || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 446 || 444 || But, again, back to give-and-take || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 447 || 445 || Now, give-san-take || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 448 || 446 || Give-and take is the secret || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 449 || 447 || Marriage, every marriage || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 450 || 448 || Up and down, in and out || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 451 || 449 || The world of commerce || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 452 || 450 || Action is one of the enigmas || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 453 || 451 || Yet to stay alive we || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 454 || style="background: red;" | 451 || Let me put it another way || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 455 || 452 || So, a partial justification || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 456 || 453 || Just above I wrote 42 || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 457 || 454 || Perhaps the clue || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 458 || 455 || The crook in Bob Lindner || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 459 || 456 || Sesame. The sex of me || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 460 || 457 || But why can I understand || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 461 || 458 || After lunch, and how || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 462 || 459 || Crooks are interested || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 463 || 460 || What I started to say || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 464 || 461 || Japanese: Their word for yes || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 465 || 462 || Chinese: A very primitive language || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 466 || 463 || I’m one of the first || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 467 || 464 || There is so much to be said || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 468 || 465 || The art of the playwright || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 469 || 466 || Beating and being || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 470 || 467 || German. The Germans are philosophers || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 471 || 469 || Anyway, the Germans || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 472 || 470 || eeeeeeeeeeeeeee || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 473 || 471 || V becomes closer || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 474 || 472 || Double V is WW || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 475 || 473 || VVVVVVV is close || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 476 || 474 || Vomiting. I see || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 477 || 475 || Mother. The masculine other || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 478 || 476 || Er would be a far || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 479 || 477 || Super. To sup and to er || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 480 || 478 || I’m getting tired again || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 481 || 479 || But I haven’t even begun || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 482 || 480 || Any rationalist reading || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 483 || 481 || For the first time I || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 484 || 482 || In the middle of the cliché || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 485 || 483 || But I just can’t get || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 486 || 484 || Let’s start with orgasm || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 487 || 485 || To attempt to go on || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 488 || 486 || To be continued tomorrow || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 489 || style="background: red;" | 486a || Before I go on with || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 490 || 487 || So, if my premise || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 491 || 488 || I keep trying to write || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 492 || 489 || Which is why I have || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 493 || 490 || Mom. A cunt O || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 494 || 491 || I’ve spent the last || 423 || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 495 || 492 || Following my Clue || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 496 || 493 || Back to bisexuals || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 497 || 494 || So, the bisexual in society || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 498 || 495 || I’m getting hipped || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 499 || 496 || The next “idea” || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 500 || 497 || What characterizes the power-mad || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 501 || 498 || I’ve just been out for lunch || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 502 || style="background: red;" | 496 || This has all been a preface || 499 || || | |||
|- | |||
| 503 || 497 || At any rate, I still believe || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 504 || 498 || And, of course, the little || || {{note|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 505 || 499 || What a jewel of a word || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 506 || 500 || But what remains || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 507 || 501 || The cop is getting stronger || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 508 || 502 || I’ve got to shake this off || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 509 || 503 || The family dinner || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 510 || 504 || I don’t have the patience || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 511 || 505 || Dynamo. Dine at mom’s || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 512 || 506 || While we’re on consonants || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 513 || 507 || Example: Formalize (Fuck of || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 514 || 508 || From time to time I worry || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 515 || 509 || Course of events || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 516 || 510 || I have postulated unisexuality || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 517 || 511 || We and Us || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 518 || 512 || World. It is a prettier || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 519 || 513 || But ‘rectal’ I’m sure || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 520 || 514 || RL again. Relish || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 521 || 515 || The difficulty in consonant || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 522 || 516 || An old cliché is called || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 523 || 517 || Regal—egal || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 524 || 518 || Acts of the body || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 525 || 519 || The is and the ing. || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 526 || 520 || When an intelligent person || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 527 || 521 || Adele gets furious these days || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 528 || 522 || Actually, there’s no contradiction || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 529 || 523 || But this opens the peculiar || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 530 || 524 || Excelsior! Hardons onward || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 531 || 525 || Excelsior: What I’m getting at || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 532 || 526 || Now, of course, an analyst || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 533 || 527 || Yet, we cannot deny it || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 534 || 528 || I’m very dissatisfied || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 535 || 529 || Time is Number || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 536 || 530 || Toynbee’s challenge || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 537 || 531 || We and wee || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 538 || 532 || The beggar-king || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 539 || 533 || The reason the common people || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 540 || 534 || And so the enigma || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 541 || 535 || And that is why certain || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 542 || 536 || A dick is a cock || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 543 || 537 || Twot. The thing of what? || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 544 || 538 || Man and society || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 545 || 539 || I just realized that the reason || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 546 || 540 || Anybody who’s really || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 547 || 541 || I have to explore || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 548 || 542 || Hemingway’s peculiar weakness || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 549 || 543 || Depressants and stimulants || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 550 || 544 || The above was hardly || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 551 || 545 || So, to begin with, || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 552 || 546 || I’m written out || || || | |||
|} | |||
===February 10, 1955=== | ===February 10, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 553 || 547 || A new typewriter ribbon || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 554 || 548 || Today is L plus 1 || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 555 || 549 || But what I want to try || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 556 || 550 || This can help to explain || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 557 || 551 || For the analyst and the analysand || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 558 || 552 || I have come to a conclusion || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 559 || 553 || The fluoridation of water || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 560 || 554 || Investigating the consonants || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 561 || 555 || On the vowels || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 562 || 556 || I have an idea || || || Note. | |||
|} | |||
===February 14, 1955=== | ===February 14, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 563 || 557 || Again I start work || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 564 || 558 || The kick-off was || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 565 || 559 || I have not warmed up || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 566 || 560 || I’ve come up with something || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 567 || 561 || For days I’ve been working || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 568 || 562 || A lover of music || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 569 || 563 || But I am the person || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 570 || 564 || It can be stated || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 571 || 565 || Pain and pleasure || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 572 || 566 || “Stupid” people find || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 573 || style="background:red;" | 565 || Antacid Analgesic || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 574 || 566 || What a title || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 575 || 567 || Yes, I am a rationalist || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 576 || 568 || And isn’t that the Devil? || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 577 || 569 || My nose has stopped running || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 578 || 570 || A truly great man || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 579 || 571 || Ruthless and Truthful || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 580 || 572 || What I’ve been avoiding || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 581 || 573 || I got the D.T.’s || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 582 || 574 || Last night taking my Seconal || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 583 || 575 || What bothered me about || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 584 || 576 || Kill or be killed || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 585 || 577 || Ted Amussen cannot express || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 586 || 578 || The and He || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 587 || 579 || Antacid Analgesic is filled || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 588 || 580 || P, I believe, signifies || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 589 || 581 || Energy spent on solving || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 590 || 582 || The curve is life || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 591 || 583 || Classicist and Romantic || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 592 || 584 || Last night on the train || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 593 || 585 || My throat is sore again || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 594 || 586 || Patience and impatience || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 595 || 587 || The reason this journal || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 596 || 588 || To understand a neurotic || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 597 || 589 || (ENTERING_and_LEAVING) || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 598 || 590 || Impatience—patience || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 599 || 591 || I’m really beginning to dig || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 600 || 592 || The malfunction of entering-leaving || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 601 || style="background:red;" | 592 || The phallic-narcissist (Jim Jones) || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 602 || 593 || Back from lunch || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 603 || style="background:red;" | 593 || But another revelatory contradiction || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 604 || 594 || “Freedom is the recognition || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 605 || 595 || I don’t know if I agree || 604 || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 606 || 596 || Let me make as assumption || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 607 || 597 || Yet, this is still true || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 608 || 598 || Which is where an understanding || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 609 || 599 || I lost weight all last summer || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 610 || 600 || I wonder if once smoking || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 611 || 601 || The rationalist says || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 612 || 602 || What I suspect about Lipton’s || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 613 || 603 || My sore throat seems gone || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 614 || 604 || One healthy thing I am || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 615 || 605 || The part and the whole || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 616 || 606 || As I said to Bob || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 617 || 607 || Reason, the logic on One || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 618 || 608 || One thing to say || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 619 || 609 || A thousand things yet || || || | |||
|} | |||
===February 21, 1955=== | ===February 21, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 620 || 610 || Avery (Men with the name || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 621 || 611 || Here we go again || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 622 || 612 || Out of curiosity || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 623 || 613 || I truly have the feeling || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 624 || 614 || The reason I believe || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 625 || 615 || Saw Mutiny on the Bounty || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 626 || 616 || And Laughton || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 627 || 617 || Over and over I come || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 628 || 618 || Sup, x er, lerve, and the Juggler || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 629 || 619 || Back to Laughton || || || Notes. | |||
|- | |||
| 630 || 620 || A few word echoes || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 631 || 621 || My sore throat || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 632 || 622 || I have an enormously tense || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 633 || 623 || Cigarette smoking || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 634 || 624 || The cigarette is society’s substitute || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 635 || style="background:red;" | 624 || A shit-eating grin || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 636 || 625 || Before I go to lunch || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 637 || 626 || Hatred is the defense || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 638 || 627 || Semen. How it appears everywhere || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 639 || 628 || Milk. Another semen-substitute || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 640 || 629 || Last night I caught a piece || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 641 || 630 || Tears and semen || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 642 || 631 || I realized during lunch || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 643 || 632 || Psychoanalyzing names || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 644 || 633 || Homosexuality || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 645 || 634 || The Burglar [Edmund Bergler] || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 646 || 635 || The phallic narcissist || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 647 || 636 || All day I have been holding || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 648 || style="background:red;" | 635 || There, Now, I like him again || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 649 || 636 || What’s in a name || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 650 || 637 || Three and tree || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 651 || 638 || Out of sight, out of mind || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 652 || 639 || I have a feeling that || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 653 || 635 || What occurs to me || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 654 || 636 || Over the weekend I took || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 655 || 637 || An article in Scientific American || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 656 || 638 || Word echoes and tag lines || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|} | |||
===February 22, 1955=== | ===February 22, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 657 || 639 || Today, I’m completely down || || Part {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 658 || 640 || I feel fairly barren of ideas || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 659 || 641 || First comes “back and front” || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 660 || 642 || A corollary. Refrigerators || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 661 || 643 || I have postulated consciousness || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 662 || 644 || There is only one revolution || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 663 || 645 || The revolutionary and the mystic || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 664 || 646 || Time. Our idea of it || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 665 || 647 || Thus, the future exists || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 666 || 648 || The value of commodities || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 667 || 649 || Has anyone remarked || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 668 || 650 || Actor’s say of an emotional || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 669 || 651 || Steve Allen obeys Joyce’s || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 670 || 652 || Social forms: We say || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 671 || 653 || Obscenity || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 672 || 654 || The double meaning of consonants || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 673 || 655 || They. Th ay Instantaneity || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 674 || 656 || When I take Lipton’s || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 675 || 657 || Psyche. Sigh—Key || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 676 || 658 || All business partnerships || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 677 || 659 || Shakespeare is the decadent genius || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 678 || 660 || The relation of h to f || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 679 || 661 || Chess. The dramatization || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 680 || 662 || The aviator is a hipster too || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 681 || 663 || Adele, as only I have seen her || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 682 || 664 || The salesman has to sell || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 683 || 665 || The foot-note leads || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 684 || 666 || I glimpse a form || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 685 || 667 || I suspect that the form || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 686 || 668 || Psyche Soma || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 687 || 669 || I can hardly complain || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 688 || 670 || I suspect that the frequency || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 689 || 671 || I still haven’t expressed || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 690 || 672 || The hush || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 691 || style="background:red;" | 672 || Laughter. We laugh when we || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 692 || 673 || The root ''oom'' || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 693 || 674 || V contain the opposed || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 694 || 675 || More on laughter || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 695 || 676 || Exh''iliar''ation and depression in writing || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 696 || 677 || Those periods in history || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 697 || 678 || In the course of this journal || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 698 || 679 || Ideas and thought || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 699 || 680 || People who are in || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 700 || 681 || Reversals. From Legman || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|} | |||
===March 4, 1955=== | ===March 4, 1955=== | ||
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%;" | |||
|- | |||
! # !! NM# !! First Words !! x-Refs !! Cut !! Notes | |||
|- | |||
| 701 || 682 || This is going to be tough || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 702 || 683 || Laughton came to town || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 703 || 684 || This typewriter is giving me || || {{icon|NO}} || | |||
|- | |||
| 704 || 685 || shit shit shit shit shit shit || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 705 || 686 || I do want to say || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 706 || 687 || In the interim || || || | |||
|- | |||
| 707 || 688 || Also I have been going || || || Note. | |||
|- | |||
| 708 || 689 || Tonight people are coming || || || | |||
|} | |||
==Questions== | ==Questions== |
Latest revision as of 07:42, 30 July 2022
Project citation: Mailer, Norman (2020). Lennon, J. Michael; Lucas, Gerald R.; Mailer, Susan, eds. "Lipton's Journal". Project Mailer. The Norman Mailer Society. Retrieved 2020-12-20.
Entry Dates
December 1, 1954
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
1 | 1 | Perhaps the artist is less | |||
2 | 2 | Lipton's seems to open one | |||
3 | 3 | Fucking is perhaps an approach | |||
4 | 4 | In relation to (1) | L1 | Note. | |
5 | 5 | The concentration camp novel | Note. Unclear x-ref # in note. | ||
6 | 6 | One should always listen attentively | Note. | ||
7 | 7 | Herbert A[ptheker]. said of Lipton’s | Note. | ||
8 | 8 | In modern jazz, one feels | Note. | ||
9 | 9 | Thoreau’s beautiful remark | Note. | ||
10 | 10 | I upset Herbert [Aptheker] by saying | |||
11 | 11 | In a short novel | Note. |
December 8, 1954
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
12 | 12 | One should always try to | |||
13 | 13 | It seems to me that | |||
14 | 14 | It is possible that many | Note. | ||
15 | 15 | All of my life with Adele | |||
16 | 16 | If there is that other world | |||
17 | 17 | Listening to a child | |||
18 | 18 | I advertise to everyone | |||
19 | 19 | Six and Four are close | |||
20 | 20 | Knowledge is systematized ignorance | |||
21 | 21 | A novel is slowly emerging | |||
22 | 22 | It may be that the | |||
23 | 23 | In the conc. camp novel | L17 | ||
24 | 24 | There may actually be such | |||
25 | 25 | Every word sets up | L24 | Note. | |
26 | 26 | Television may have some extraordinary | Note. | ||
27 | 27 | Possibly the spasmodic nervous system | |||
28 | 28 | Vomiting may be the orgasm | |||
29 | 29 | No saint can be a teacher | |||
30 | 30 | Infants may be enormously wise | |||
31 | 31 | The saint and the psychopath | Note. | ||
32 | 32 | No one is more unreligious | |||
33 | 33 | Medicine may be witchcraft | end: [and] its emphasis on progress. | ||
34 | 34 | The aggressive instinct | |||
35 | 35 | Psychoanalysis, liberalism, etc. etc. | |||
36 | 36 | I have learned more from | |||
37 | 37 | In The Deer Park after the | Note. | ||
38 | 38 | If the more saintly people | |||
39 | 39 | In a Collier’s article | Note. | ||
40 | 40 | Words are not entirely bad | |||
41 | 41 | Death may be the price | |||
42 | 42 | I know nothing about semantics | |||
43 | 43 | Talk with Rhoda L. | Note. |
December 17, 1954
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
44 | 44 | The saint and the churchman | |||
45 | 45 | There is no death-instinct | |||
46 | 46 | What worries me today | |||
47 | 47 | Spengler is a great writer | L48 | Notes. | |
48 | 48 | Swing in jazz is different | |||
49 | 49 | When Susie speaks of “war” | |||
50 | 50 | There is a lesson for me | L47 | ||
51 | 51 | A remark on why psychoanalysts | |||
52 | 52 | When the businessman thinks | |||
53 | 53 | Perhaps the reason Susy | Note. | ||
54 | 54 | I understand now what Danny | Notes. | ||
55 | 55 | The word is a flat | |||
56 | 56 | In the larger sense | Note. | ||
57 | 57 | The Stalinists have sneered | Note. | ||
58 | 58 | My characters in The Deer Park | |||
59 | 58 | Equations: Man is born | Added punctuation in ¶3. | ||
60 | 59 | The big novel could | Note. | ||
61 | 60 | I learned a practical matter | |||
62 | 61 | I have always hated sentimentality | |||
63 | 62 | The measurement of time | |||
64 | 63 | Advertising and television and radio | Note. | ||
65 | 64 | Because the desire for material | |||
66 | 65 | Almost always experts can never |
December 28, 1954
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
67 | 66 | At its best, my mind | |||
68 | 67 | Over and over again |
December 29, 1954
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
69 | 68 | “Vested interest” is enormously more | |||
70 | 69 | Get beneath words | (partial) | ||
71 | 70 | The gossip is the great | |||
72 | 71 | Words have not only echoes | |||
73 | 72 | The concealments of language | |||
74 | 73 | The sensual is the soul’s | |||
75 | 74 | The Sense of the Past | |||
76 | 75 | There are two kinds of hatred | |||
77 | 76 | The power of the word | Note. | ||
78 | 77 | They key to Sergius’ character | |||
79 | 78 | The breakup with Lulu | Note. | ||
80 | 79 | Jokes. Charley Wiener just said | Note needed?: Charley Wiener | ||
81 | 80 | Eitel in court | Note. | ||
82 | 81 | In error there is also truth | |||
83 | 82 | Eitel and Elena—last chapter | Note. Use partial w/ L81, too. | ||
84 | 83 | Don Beda | Note. | ||
85 | 84 | Interpretations of present events | Notes. | ||
86 | 85 | My feeling about semantics | L42 | Note. | |
87 | 86 | One thing must be said | L85, L71 | ||
88 | 87 | Stories of dreams | |||
89 | 88 | Bombing as the great shitting | |||
90 | 89 | Comedians and comic writers | |||
91 | 90 | Women who always hate | |||
92 | 91 | The more knowledge | |||
93 | 92 | Possibly, bad works of art | |||
94 | 93 | The spy (another adventurer) | Note. | ||
95 | 94 | Actors and spies | |||
96 | 95 | When a friend says | |||
97 | 96 | “Am I boring you?” | |||
98 | 97 | So, boredom, depression, laughter | |||
99 | 98 | Saints and psychopaths | |||
100 | 99 | Laughter is spiritual | |||
101 | 100 | The psychopath sees the present | |||
102 | 101 | So the hipster is the adventurer | |||
103 | 102 | Given my intellectual verbal mind | |||
104 | 103 | A possibility occurs to me | Note. | ||
105 | 104 | Marion Faye note | |||
106 | 105 | Note 103 could be | L103 | Could the x-ref actually be L105? | |
107 | 106 | Marion Faye note | Note. | ||
108 | 107 | Marion Faye on Eitel | |||
109 | 108 | Marion Faye in prison | |||
110 | 109 | Sergius is my brother | |||
111 | 110 | Marion F Journal | |||
112 | 111 | My journal again | |||
113 | 112 | False humility | Seems like this should not be cut, as L115 alludes to it. | ||
114 | 113 | Marion Faye journal | |||
115 | 114 | (My journal) Arrogance | |||
116 | 115 | Humor is more than wit | |||
117 | 116 | Marion Faye’s note | |||
118 | 117 | Man may be terrible | |||
119 | 118 | The fear of being ridiculous | |||
120 | 119 | Toward the end of Marion | |||
121 | 120 | Marion Faye’s note about | |||
122 | 121 | Any art-work which | |||
123 | 122 | “Do you know, Sergius?” | |||
124 | 123 | Dorothea O’Faye could figure |
December 31, 1954
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
125 | 124 | I am getting whole bodies | |||
126 | 125 | Thoughts. All thoughts in words | Note. | ||
127 | 126 | People who make love | |||
128 | 127 | Get a tape recorder | Note. [add tea time info] still needed | ||
129 | 128 | Word echoes: We have | |||
130 | 129 | On the understanding of genius | |||
131 | 130 | Word echoes. Mother and smother | |||
132 | 131 | Seriously, truly, just simply | |||
133 | 132 | In Marion Faye’s journal | |||
134 | 133 | Jazz is more creative | |||
135 | 134 | I used to be outwardly | |||
136 | 135 | Years ago, working with Malaquais | |||
137 | 136 | The world allows us to express | |||
138 | 137 | My ambition remains | |||
139 | 138 | I think that the new | |||
140 | 139 | Sexual psychopathy would be normal | Note. | ||
141 | 140 | What I learn about The Deer Park | |||
142 | 141 | Most celebrities are people | |||
143 | 142 | Marion Faye’s journal | |||
144 | 143 | Anyone reading these notes | |||
145 | 144 | At the point where Eitel | |||
146 | 145 | The universe is a vast puzzle | |||
147 | 146 | In N.Y. if we want | Note. | ||
148 | 147 | Time is the sense of society | |||
149 | 148 | The so-called decadent writers | |||
150 | 149 | Wild thought. The atom bomb | Note. | ||
151 | 150 | Don Beda should be | |||
152 | 151 | What Stalinists see | |||
153 | 152 | Don Beda should be | |||
154 | 153 | Time as the sense of society | Added hand-written note, but need to check last two words. | ||
155 | 154 | Bob Lindner. As he reads | Notes. | ||
156 | 155 | The homo-erotic corollary | Notes. | ||
157 | 156 | The corollary of this | Note. | ||
158 | 157 | What courage Adele has | Notes. | ||
159 | 158 | What terrifies me is exactly | |||
160 | 159 | The fuck novel, “Antacid Analgesique.” | Note. |
January 3, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
161 | 160 | If this record is to have | |||
162 | 161 | One of the curious effects | |||
163 | 162 | What I dislike so much | |||
164 | 163 | Perhaps a man kills | |||
165 | 164 | With Marion Faye this took | |||
166 | 165 | A psychopath expands | |||
167 | 166 | Any human scene | |||
168 | 167 | Precise speech appeals | |||
169 | 168 | Our fear of ghosts | |||
170 | 169 | On the other hand | |||
171 | 170 | The sensitivity spectrum | Note. | ||
172 | 171 | Does telepathic mean sick telepathy? | |||
173 | 172 | On television, many of the ads | |||
174 | 173 | There is also the possibility | |||
175 | 174 | Listening to Dizzy Gillespie | Note. | ||
176 | 175 | Word echoes | |||
177 | 176 | I suspect that an index | |||
178 | 177 | Psychopathic love | |||
179 | 178 | Consider whether Elena after | |||
180 | 179 | Sports and sex | |||
181 | 180 | Musicians. The saxophonist | |||
182 | 181 | Steve Allen talking while | Note. | ||
183 | 182 | I heard “The Star-Spangled Banner” | |||
184 | 183 | Competition of personality marks | |||
185 | 184 | Name for a Negro | |||
186 | 185 | Be-bop chorus | |||
187 | 186 | We may all have a social | Notes. | ||
188 | 187 | Perhaps the secret | Note. | ||
189 | 188 | This is the age | |||
190 | 189 | Memory may be a layer | Mailer underlined the first two sentences and wrote “Expand” in the margin. | ||
191 | 190 | There’s no such thing | |||
192 | 191 | How do you like my | |||
193 | 192 | Fatty foods are cunt foods | |||
194 | 193 | Bob told the pickle factory joke | |||
195 | 194 | Obscenity substitutes | |||
196 | 195 | Obscenity echoes | |||
197 | 196 | In Barbary Shore I planted |
January 20, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
198 | 197 | The poor drawing | |||
199 | 198 | Looking at myself | Note. | ||
200 | 199 | This is the age | Notes. | ||
201 | 200 | When we run across | Note. | ||
202 | 201 | The tragic air of Mexico | Note. | ||
203 | 202 | Rich boys are proud | |||
204 | 203 | “Instants” and “moments” | |||
205 | 204 | John Walsh is a homosexual | Note. NM wrote “expand” in the margin-left of the last paragraph. | ||
206 | 205 | If I have qualities of genius | |||
207 | 206 | The Perfect Secretary | See NM’s written gloss. | ||
208 | 207 | The night Bob spoke | Note. | ||
209 | 208 | The affected person | |||
210 | 209 | How much real hatred | |||
211 | 210 | What we do on the surface | |||
212 | 211 | Homeostasis may be true | (partial) | ||
213 | 212 | Our perception of others | |||
214 | 213 | Word echoes. Son is sin |
January 24, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
215 | 214 | Word echoes. Possible way | |||
216 | 215 | Friday, Saturday, and Sunday | Note. | ||
217 | 216 | To begin with, one | Notes. | ||
218 | 217 | How I’m getting to love | |||
219 | 218 | Spies are takers | |||
220 | 219 | Thoughts about The Deer Park | |||
221 | 220 | When Elena is first introduced | |||
222 | 221 | Wrestlers and boxers | |||
223 | 222 | Homeostasis and sociostasis | Note. | ||
224 | 223 | What I have noticed | Note. | ||
225 | 224 | My character. I have always | Notes. | ||
226 | 225 | Remember: The fear of being | |||
227 | 226 | In The Journal of Marion Faye | |||
228 | 227 | The movement of my writing | Should McLeod be glossed? | ||
229 | 228 | I have always been the romantic | |||
230 | 229 | To condemn | L205, L228 | ||
231 | 230 | Our resistance about changing | Note. | ||
232 | 231 | Rojo and ojo | |||
233 | 232 | Man and his dog | |||
234 | 233 | For three years while writing | |||
235 | 234 | Romance and realism | Note. | ||
236 | 235 | The saint and the psychopath | |||
237 | 236 | In the saint-psychopath sense | |||
238 | 237 | This is the best day | |||
239 | 238 | I was deeply instinctively right | |||
240 | 239 | Yet the course of human history | |||
241 | 240 | For years, unknowingly | |||
242 | 241 | Bebop. P and B are sibling consonants | Notes. | ||
244 | 243 | Golfers are people who take | |||
245 | 244 | Put another way, the sociostatic | |||
246 | 245 | But look at the philosophical | |||
247 | 246 | It also suggests that action | |||
248 | 247 | Which leads me to | Note. | ||
249 | 248 | English is so magnificently blunt | |||
250 | 249 | To go back to note 245 | L245 | Notes. | |
251 | 250 | Joyful thought | |||
252 | 251 | Children’s eating | Note. | ||
253 | 252 | Everybody is both male and female | Should NM’s spelling be made consistent: e.g., bi-sexual or bisexual? |
January 25, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
254 | 253 | The advances in medicine | |||
255 | 254 | The predictor, the prophet | Note. | ||
256 | 255 | The above note | L255 | ||
257 | 256 | Bob is the dishonest man | |||
258 | 257 | I wonder if one doesn’t | |||
259 | 258 | Typing errors | |||
260 | 259 | But I wanted to finish | (partial) | Note. | |
261 | 260 | What I wrote about Sergius | |||
262 | 261 | This Journal in so far | |||
263 | 262 | I realized so many funny | |||
264 | 263 | Since I started this Journal | Notes. | ||
265 | 264 | The sense of time | |||
266 | 265 | Old people don’t slow down | |||
267 | 266 | To continue 265 I wonder | L265 | ||
268 | 268 | The interesting confirmation | L267 | ||
269 | 269 | Fed up. We stuff ourselves | Joe Rosenthal should be glossed? | ||
270 | 270 | Radicals. Particularly socialists | Fra Jean? | ||
271 | 271 | Prose on wings, tra-la, tra-la | L270 | Note. | |
272 | 272 | So, modestly, I see my mission | |||
273 | 273 | Jews hated Hitler violently | |||
274 | 274 | What is a monster? |
January 26, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
275 | 275 | I am coming to believe | |||
276 | 276 | I have noticed in analytic | Note. | ||
277 | 277 | Let me put it this way | Should "basis" be "basic" in sentence 1? | ||
278 | 278 | I know now why I | |||
279 | 279 | Clues, mysteries, puns | |||
280 | 280 | In this sense, we are all | |||
281 | 281 | If the above sounds very fancy | L280 | ||
282 | 282 | Sociostasis and sociostasis | Notes. | ||
283 | 283 | So in that sense | L282 | Note. | |
284 | 284 | Little confirmations of 282 | L282 | ||
285 | 285 | I have to face something | Note. | ||
286 | 286 | Dialogue: Yesterday, Hiram Haydn | Note. | ||
287 | 287 | Word echoes: Go, man, go | |||
288 | 288 | Bob Lindner is in the dramatic | Note. | ||
289 | 289 | Let me try 283 again | L283 | Note. | |
290 | 290 | Now I come back | |||
291 | 291 | The all-out Marxist | |||
292 | 292 | Now, back to 290 | L290, L395 (in note) | Note. | |
293 | 293 | I’m getting exhausted | |||
294 | 294 | One takes in order to understand | |||
295 | 295 | But wrestlers who are givers | |||
296 | 296 | Talk is cheap, action is hard | |||
297 | 297 | Jokes. Argo. | |||
298 | 298 | No wonder I’ve always been | |||
299 | 299 | Back to x Jargon | |||
300 | 300 | B is the first consonant | |||
301 | 301 | Infant and I am faint | |||
302 | 302 | Ant and and | |||
303 | 303 | Obscenities: 69 | |||
304 | 304 | Jazz. Z and s are sibling components | |||
305 | 305 | At this moment I’m sick | |||
306 | 306 | But what a compulsion | L305 | ||
307 | 307 | I’m getting weary | Note. | ||
308 | 308 | Fuck, piss, cock, shit, cunt | |||
309 | 309 | I have heard writers say | |||
310 | 310 | When I was a kid | Note. | ||
311 | 311 | My pompous man again | |||
312 | 312 | It seems obvious that insanity | |||
313 | 313 | Word echoes. Job | |||
314 | 314 | Aristocrats are usually takers |
January 27, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
315 | 315 | As was evident in the notes | |||
316 | 316 | But what is also interesting | |||
317 | 317 | What I distrust of course. | |||
318 | 318 | On the positive side | |||
319 | 319 | Letter echoes: Be | |||
320 | 320 | For some time I have wanted | Note. | ||
321 | 321 | The business of putting | |||
322 | 322 | Corollary. Whenever one reads |
January 31, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
323 | 323 | My birthday today | |||
324 | 324 | A few word echoes | |||
325 | 325 | Give-and-take | |||
326 | 326 | The possibility of other | Notes. | ||
327 | 327 | The voice of radio and recordings | |||
328 | 328 | But, carry this a step further | |||
329 | 329 | One’s own voice | |||
330 | 330 | One other observation | |||
331 | 331 | Mimics are always psychopaths | |||
332 | 332 | Last week I wrote | Search | Note. | |
333 | 333 | I have the feeling these days | How should the 3rd sentence read? | ||
334 | 334 | A great deal of this journal | |||
335 | 335 | Jealousy. But what a mountain | |||
336 | 336 | The cynic | |||
337 | 337 | The conservatism of the female | |||
338 | 338 | Word echoes. Breath, stripped | |||
339 | 339 | Exceptional people | Notes. | ||
340 | 340 | Which brings me to Bob Lidner | Note. | ||
341 | 341 | Page 100 | |||
342 | 342 | Stimulants. My ideas which started | |||
343 | 343 | Fascination keeps us on | |||
344 | 344 | What I neglected to say | |||
345 | 345 | Half-way stations | |||
346 | 346 | Journalists—another variety of psychopath | |||
347 | 347 | An interesting confirmation | |||
348 | 348 | Pro and con—prick and cunt | |||
349 | 349 | The Catholic Church | |||
350 | 350 | Word echoes. The and he | |||
351 | 350A | Word mirrors: | |||
352 | 351 | I cannot say it often enough | Should “od” be corrected? | ||
353 | 352 | Horse-racing. An article | Note. | ||
354 | 353 | Word echoes: Defense | |||
355 | 354 | Word echoes. Good, God | |||
356 | 355 | Good. Go to d, Go | |||
357 | 356 | Modern painting | |||
358 | 357 | The key to Bill Styron’s nature | Note. | ||
359 | 358 | The inter-fecundation is starting | |||
360 | 359 | Which gives an insight into | |||
361 | 360 | I am always inept at arguing | |||
362 | 361 | More typing errors deliver | |||
363 | 362 | God and Jehovah, goal and jail | |||
364 | 363 | Word echo: By—By | |||
365 | 364 | A lot of this is probably | |||
366 | 365 | A corroborating proof | |||
367 | 366 | The reformer’s liberal ideas | |||
368 | 367 | Nat Halper. His work on the Joyce | Note. | ||
369 | 368 | Modern art. Liberals, social democrats | |||
370 | 369 | Elena is a failure | |||
371 | 370 | Cancer. I believe instinctively | |||
372 | 371 | For The Deer Park | |||
373 | 372 | Word echoes: If and Is | |||
374 | 373 | I wrote the last note | |||
375 | 374 | Consonant echoes: X | |||
376 | 375 | The cross was where man | |||
377 | 376 | Adele’s qualities | |||
378 | 377 | The voice | |||
379 | 378 | A note on my Self-Analysis | Notes. Is “sociismus” supposed to be “socialismus” (socialism)? | ||
380 | 379 | Word echoes. Son and sun | |||
381 | 380 | What-the-hell | |||
382 | 381 | Word echoes. Her and err | |||
383 | 382 | What I am doing with letters | |||
384 | 383 | Is W the world? | |||
385 | 384 | Son of a bitch | |||
386 | 385 | Simply, directly, I excited | |||
387 | 386 | Once in a while | |||
388 | 387 | f and v. F is fuck | |||
389 | 388 | I’m getting a little tired now | |||
390 | 389 | Anyway, I think I’ll finish | Notes. |
February 1, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
391 | 390 | Today makes two months | |||
392 | 391 | Last night, having dinner | |||
393 | 392 | Later, today, if I can | |||
394 | 393 | What appears to me right | |||
395 | 394 | Word echoes. (I suppose | |||
396 | 395 | Another word echo here | |||
397 | 396 | The Burglar again | |||
398 | 397 | Disagreeable as it is | Notes. | ||
399 | 398 | I suppose the last note | |||
400 | 399 | To finish note 390 | 390 | Notes. | |
401 | 400 | One addition to this | |||
402 | 401 | Back from lunch | |||
403 | 402 | A comment on the above | 402 | ||
404 | 403 | At the other end | Note. | ||
405 | 404 | The Catholic would argue | Note. | ||
406 | 405 | I may have a clue | |||
407 | 406 | Word echoes. I’ve discussed jazz | |||
408 | 407 | If my identification of red | |||
409 | 408 | Gate. And r: Great. | |||
410 | 409 | The strength of the Church. | Note. | ||
411 | 410 | A note on my father. | Note. | ||
412 | 411 | And now I understand Monroe | Note. | ||
413 | 412 | On how I can’t destroy love. | Note. | ||
414 | 413 | One thing bothers me. | |||
415 | 414 | A lay analyst. | |||
416 | 415 | I have a hunch | |||
417 | 416 | My sexual scar. | 207 | ||
418 | 417 | Depression is coming on | |||
419 | 418 | Perhaps the sexual explanation | |||
420 | 419 | Jesus, I’d rather be | |||
421 | 420 | A little interesting and | |||
422 | 421 | Decadence. I wonder | |||
423 | 422 | The above note was written | 422 | ||
424 | 423 | Echoes and opposites. | |||
425 | 424 | The spectrum of the saint-psychopath. | Note. | ||
426 | 425 | The above not ought | 425 | ||
427 | 426 | Before I quit, I want to list |
February 2, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
428 | 427 | Continuing on H | |||
429 | 428 | The horrible thought occurs | |||
430 | 429 | The artist and his paranoia. | |||
431 | 430 | Note 214 was about the | 215 | ||
432 | 431 | It is really incredible that | |||
433 | 432 | Each of the Church’s dictums | |||
434 | 433 | The gambler’s debt | |||
435 | 434 | I’ve spent the last few hours | Notes. Where should the open parenthesis end? I don’t see the last sentence in the original. |
February 7, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
436 | 435 | The opening into myself | The first parenthesis does not close. | ||
437 | 436 | One idea in this | Text added to 436. | ||
438 | 436 | The intellectual is antipathetic | |||
439 | 437 | At any rate each time | |||
440 | 438 | I have to explain what | |||
441 | 439 | But I go at this | |||
442 | 440 | Besides I may discover | |||
443 | 441 | Anyway, let’s go back | |||
444 | 442 | Parenthesis after parenthesis | |||
445 | 443 | The anarchist as he exists | |||
446 | 444 | But, again, back to give-and-take | |||
447 | 445 | Now, give-san-take | |||
448 | 446 | Give-and take is the secret | |||
449 | 447 | Marriage, every marriage | |||
450 | 448 | Up and down, in and out | |||
451 | 449 | The world of commerce | |||
452 | 450 | Action is one of the enigmas | |||
453 | 451 | Yet to stay alive we | |||
454 | 451 | Let me put it another way | |||
455 | 452 | So, a partial justification | |||
456 | 453 | Just above I wrote 42 | |||
457 | 454 | Perhaps the clue | |||
458 | 455 | The crook in Bob Lindner | Note. | ||
459 | 456 | Sesame. The sex of me | |||
460 | 457 | But why can I understand | Note. | ||
461 | 458 | After lunch, and how | |||
462 | 459 | Crooks are interested | Note. | ||
463 | 460 | What I started to say | |||
464 | 461 | Japanese: Their word for yes | |||
465 | 462 | Chinese: A very primitive language | |||
466 | 463 | I’m one of the first | Note. | ||
467 | 464 | There is so much to be said | |||
468 | 465 | The art of the playwright | Note. | ||
469 | 466 | Beating and being | |||
470 | 467 | German. The Germans are philosophers | |||
471 | 469 | Anyway, the Germans | Note. | ||
472 | 470 | eeeeeeeeeeeeeee | |||
473 | 471 | V becomes closer | |||
474 | 472 | Double V is WW | |||
475 | 473 | VVVVVVV is close | |||
476 | 474 | Vomiting. I see | |||
477 | 475 | Mother. The masculine other | |||
478 | 476 | Er would be a far | |||
479 | 477 | Super. To sup and to er | |||
480 | 478 | I’m getting tired again | |||
481 | 479 | But I haven’t even begun | Note. | ||
482 | 480 | Any rationalist reading | |||
483 | 481 | For the first time I | |||
484 | 482 | In the middle of the cliché | |||
485 | 483 | But I just can’t get | |||
486 | 484 | Let’s start with orgasm | |||
487 | 485 | To attempt to go on | |||
488 | 486 | To be continued tomorrow | |||
489 | 486a | Before I go on with | |||
490 | 487 | So, if my premise | Note. | ||
491 | 488 | I keep trying to write | |||
492 | 489 | Which is why I have | |||
493 | 490 | Mom. A cunt O | |||
494 | 491 | I’ve spent the last | 423 | ||
495 | 492 | Following my Clue | |||
496 | 493 | Back to bisexuals | |||
497 | 494 | So, the bisexual in society | |||
498 | 495 | I’m getting hipped | |||
499 | 496 | The next “idea” | |||
500 | 497 | What characterizes the power-mad | |||
501 | 498 | I’ve just been out for lunch | |||
502 | 496 | This has all been a preface | 499 | ||
503 | 497 | At any rate, I still believe | |||
504 | 498 | And, of course, the little | ^ | ||
505 | 499 | What a jewel of a word | |||
506 | 500 | But what remains | Note. | ||
507 | 501 | The cop is getting stronger | |||
508 | 502 | I’ve got to shake this off | |||
509 | 503 | The family dinner | |||
510 | 504 | I don’t have the patience | |||
511 | 505 | Dynamo. Dine at mom’s | |||
512 | 506 | While we’re on consonants | |||
513 | 507 | Example: Formalize (Fuck of | |||
514 | 508 | From time to time I worry | |||
515 | 509 | Course of events | |||
516 | 510 | I have postulated unisexuality | Note. | ||
517 | 511 | We and Us | |||
518 | 512 | World. It is a prettier | |||
519 | 513 | But ‘rectal’ I’m sure | |||
520 | 514 | RL again. Relish | |||
521 | 515 | The difficulty in consonant | |||
522 | 516 | An old cliché is called | |||
523 | 517 | Regal—egal | |||
524 | 518 | Acts of the body | |||
525 | 519 | The is and the ing. | |||
526 | 520 | When an intelligent person | Note. | ||
527 | 521 | Adele gets furious these days | |||
528 | 522 | Actually, there’s no contradiction | Note. | ||
529 | 523 | But this opens the peculiar | |||
530 | 524 | Excelsior! Hardons onward | |||
531 | 525 | Excelsior: What I’m getting at | |||
532 | 526 | Now, of course, an analyst | |||
533 | 527 | Yet, we cannot deny it | |||
534 | 528 | I’m very dissatisfied | |||
535 | 529 | Time is Number | |||
536 | 530 | Toynbee’s challenge | |||
537 | 531 | We and wee | |||
538 | 532 | The beggar-king | |||
539 | 533 | The reason the common people | |||
540 | 534 | And so the enigma | |||
541 | 535 | And that is why certain | |||
542 | 536 | A dick is a cock | |||
543 | 537 | Twot. The thing of what? | |||
544 | 538 | Man and society | |||
545 | 539 | I just realized that the reason | Note. | ||
546 | 540 | Anybody who’s really | |||
547 | 541 | I have to explore | |||
548 | 542 | Hemingway’s peculiar weakness | |||
549 | 543 | Depressants and stimulants | |||
550 | 544 | The above was hardly | |||
551 | 545 | So, to begin with, | |||
552 | 546 | I’m written out |
February 10, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
553 | 547 | A new typewriter ribbon | |||
554 | 548 | Today is L plus 1 | |||
555 | 549 | But what I want to try | |||
556 | 550 | This can help to explain | |||
557 | 551 | For the analyst and the analysand | |||
558 | 552 | I have come to a conclusion | Note. | ||
559 | 553 | The fluoridation of water | |||
560 | 554 | Investigating the consonants | |||
561 | 555 | On the vowels | |||
562 | 556 | I have an idea | Note. |
February 14, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
563 | 557 | Again I start work | |||
564 | 558 | The kick-off was | Note. | ||
565 | 559 | I have not warmed up | |||
566 | 560 | I’ve come up with something | |||
567 | 561 | For days I’ve been working | |||
568 | 562 | A lover of music | |||
569 | 563 | But I am the person | |||
570 | 564 | It can be stated | |||
571 | 565 | Pain and pleasure | |||
572 | 566 | “Stupid” people find | Note. | ||
573 | 565 | Antacid Analgesic | Note. | ||
574 | 566 | What a title | Note. | ||
575 | 567 | Yes, I am a rationalist | |||
576 | 568 | And isn’t that the Devil? | |||
577 | 569 | My nose has stopped running | |||
578 | 570 | A truly great man | |||
579 | 571 | Ruthless and Truthful | |||
580 | 572 | What I’ve been avoiding | |||
581 | 573 | I got the D.T.’s | |||
582 | 574 | Last night taking my Seconal | |||
583 | 575 | What bothered me about | Notes. | ||
584 | 576 | Kill or be killed | |||
585 | 577 | Ted Amussen cannot express | Notes. | ||
586 | 578 | The and He | |||
587 | 579 | Antacid Analgesic is filled | |||
588 | 580 | P, I believe, signifies | |||
589 | 581 | Energy spent on solving | |||
590 | 582 | The curve is life | |||
591 | 583 | Classicist and Romantic | |||
592 | 584 | Last night on the train | |||
593 | 585 | My throat is sore again | |||
594 | 586 | Patience and impatience | |||
595 | 587 | The reason this journal | |||
596 | 588 | To understand a neurotic | |||
597 | 589 | (ENTERING_and_LEAVING) | |||
598 | 590 | Impatience—patience | |||
599 | 591 | I’m really beginning to dig | |||
600 | 592 | The malfunction of entering-leaving | |||
601 | 592 | The phallic-narcissist (Jim Jones) | |||
602 | 593 | Back from lunch | |||
603 | 593 | But another revelatory contradiction | |||
604 | 594 | “Freedom is the recognition | |||
605 | 595 | I don’t know if I agree | 604 | ||
606 | 596 | Let me make as assumption | |||
607 | 597 | Yet, this is still true | |||
608 | 598 | Which is where an understanding | Note. | ||
609 | 599 | I lost weight all last summer | |||
610 | 600 | I wonder if once smoking | |||
611 | 601 | The rationalist says | |||
612 | 602 | What I suspect about Lipton’s | |||
613 | 603 | My sore throat seems gone | Note. | ||
614 | 604 | One healthy thing I am | |||
615 | 605 | The part and the whole | |||
616 | 606 | As I said to Bob | |||
617 | 607 | Reason, the logic on One | |||
618 | 608 | One thing to say | |||
619 | 609 | A thousand things yet |
February 21, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
620 | 610 | Avery (Men with the name | |||
621 | 611 | Here we go again | |||
622 | 612 | Out of curiosity | |||
623 | 613 | I truly have the feeling | |||
624 | 614 | The reason I believe | |||
625 | 615 | Saw Mutiny on the Bounty | Notes. | ||
626 | 616 | And Laughton | |||
627 | 617 | Over and over I come | |||
628 | 618 | Sup, x er, lerve, and the Juggler | |||
629 | 619 | Back to Laughton | Notes. | ||
630 | 620 | A few word echoes | |||
631 | 621 | My sore throat | |||
632 | 622 | I have an enormously tense | |||
633 | 623 | Cigarette smoking | |||
634 | 624 | The cigarette is society’s substitute | |||
635 | 624 | A shit-eating grin | |||
636 | 625 | Before I go to lunch | |||
637 | 626 | Hatred is the defense | |||
638 | 627 | Semen. How it appears everywhere | |||
639 | 628 | Milk. Another semen-substitute | |||
640 | 629 | Last night I caught a piece | Note. | ||
641 | 630 | Tears and semen | Note. | ||
642 | 631 | I realized during lunch | |||
643 | 632 | Psychoanalyzing names | |||
644 | 633 | Homosexuality | Note. | ||
645 | 634 | The Burglar [Edmund Bergler] | |||
646 | 635 | The phallic narcissist | |||
647 | 636 | All day I have been holding | |||
648 | 635 | There, Now, I like him again | |||
649 | 636 | What’s in a name | |||
650 | 637 | Three and tree | |||
651 | 638 | Out of sight, out of mind | |||
652 | 639 | I have a feeling that | |||
653 | 635 | What occurs to me | |||
654 | 636 | Over the weekend I took | Note. | ||
655 | 637 | An article in Scientific American | |||
656 | 638 | Word echoes and tag lines |
February 22, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
657 | 639 | Today, I’m completely down | Part | ||
658 | 640 | I feel fairly barren of ideas | |||
659 | 641 | First comes “back and front” | |||
660 | 642 | A corollary. Refrigerators | |||
661 | 643 | I have postulated consciousness | |||
662 | 644 | There is only one revolution | |||
663 | 645 | The revolutionary and the mystic | |||
664 | 646 | Time. Our idea of it | |||
665 | 647 | Thus, the future exists | |||
666 | 648 | The value of commodities | |||
667 | 649 | Has anyone remarked | |||
668 | 650 | Actor’s say of an emotional | |||
669 | 651 | Steve Allen obeys Joyce’s | |||
670 | 652 | Social forms: We say | |||
671 | 653 | Obscenity | |||
672 | 654 | The double meaning of consonants | |||
673 | 655 | They. Th ay Instantaneity | |||
674 | 656 | When I take Lipton’s | |||
675 | 657 | Psyche. Sigh—Key | |||
676 | 658 | All business partnerships | |||
677 | 659 | Shakespeare is the decadent genius | |||
678 | 660 | The relation of h to f | |||
679 | 661 | Chess. The dramatization | |||
680 | 662 | The aviator is a hipster too | |||
681 | 663 | Adele, as only I have seen her | Note. | ||
682 | 664 | The salesman has to sell | |||
683 | 665 | The foot-note leads | |||
684 | 666 | I glimpse a form | |||
685 | 667 | I suspect that the form | |||
686 | 668 | Psyche Soma | |||
687 | 669 | I can hardly complain | |||
688 | 670 | I suspect that the frequency | |||
689 | 671 | I still haven’t expressed | |||
690 | 672 | The hush | |||
691 | 672 | Laughter. We laugh when we | |||
692 | 673 | The root oom | |||
693 | 674 | V contain the opposed | |||
694 | 675 | More on laughter | |||
695 | 676 | Exhiliaration and depression in writing | |||
696 | 677 | Those periods in history | |||
697 | 678 | In the course of this journal | |||
698 | 679 | Ideas and thought | |||
699 | 680 | People who are in | |||
700 | 681 | Reversals. From Legman |
March 4, 1955
# | NM# | First Words | x-Refs | Cut | Notes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
701 | 682 | This is going to be tough | |||
702 | 683 | Laughton came to town | Note. | ||
703 | 684 | This typewriter is giving me | |||
704 | 685 | shit shit shit shit shit shit | |||
705 | 686 | I do want to say | |||
706 | 687 | In the interim | |||
707 | 688 | Also I have been going | Note. | ||
708 | 689 | Tonight people are coming |
Questions
- What do we want to do with omitted entry numbers? Just skip them? Or should they be included in the digital version but not the printed?
- Are the numbers on Donna’s transcript the new, correct numbers? (I know Mike said that Mailer mis-numbered some entries.)
- Should each entry date have its own index page? Perhaps each numbered entry could be summarized here?
- Should each numbered entry should have its own (sub)page? I think yes.
- Should each numbered entry have a title other than a number? Each could have a shortcut, so if the title is
Lipton’s Journal/December 1, 1954/1
, the shortcut could beLJ1
or justL1
. - Should we categorize numbered entries? Thematically? Style of entry?